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Title details for Ask a Ninja Presents the Ninja Handbook by Douglas Sarine - Available

Ask a Ninja Presents the Ninja Handbook

by Douglas Sarine
Kent Nichols
ebook
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DEADLY NINJA WISDOM FOR THE NON-NINJA
Carefully consider the joy of your soft-headed ignorance before you begin to run, flip, and jump along the Ninja Path.
  
After much debate and in a spirit of morbid amusement, the International Order of Ninjas has chosen to produce The Ninja Handbook, the first-ever secret ninja training guide specifically designed for the non-ninja.
Most non-ninjas who handle these delicate, deadly pages will die–probably in an elaborately horrific and painful manner. But whether your journey lasts five seconds or five days or (rather inconceivably) five years, all those who bravely take up this text and follow the tenets and trials laid out within will die knowing they were as ninja as they possibly could’ve been.
For the true of heart or the extremely lucky, this powerful and honorable manuscript contains such phenomenal ninja wisdom as:
•How to create and name your very own lethal ninja clan
•The proper weapon to use when fighting a vampire pumpkin
•Why clowns and robots are so dangerous on the Internet
•Easy-to-follow charts showing when to slice and when to stab
•How to execute such ultradeadly kicks as the Driving Miss Daisy
•Why pretty much every ninja movie ever made sucks
•How to make a shoggoth explode using well-placed foliage
•What the heck a shoggoth is and why you’ll need to make it explode
•Death Aide certification
•And much more ninjafied enlightenment on every shuriken-sharp page!
Remember: People do not take the Path, the Path takes people.
Expand title description text
Publisher: Crown

Kindle Book

  • Release date: September 9, 2008

OverDrive Read

  • ISBN: 9780307449641
  • Release date: September 9, 2008

EPUB ebook

  • ISBN: 9780307449641
  • File size: 4561 KB
  • Release date: September 9, 2008
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Formats

Kindle Book
OverDrive Read
EPUB ebook

subjects

Reference Sports & Recreations Nonfiction Humor (Nonfiction)

Languages

English

DEADLY NINJA WISDOM FOR THE NON-NINJA
Carefully consider the joy of your soft-headed ignorance before you begin to run, flip, and jump along the Ninja Path.
  
After much debate and in a spirit of morbid amusement, the International Order of Ninjas has chosen to produce The Ninja Handbook, the first-ever secret ninja training guide specifically designed for the non-ninja.
Most non-ninjas who handle these delicate, deadly pages will die–probably in an elaborately horrific and painful manner. But whether your journey lasts five seconds or five days or (rather inconceivably) five years, all those who bravely take up this text and follow the tenets and trials laid out within will die knowing they were as ninja as they possibly could’ve been.
For the true of heart or the extremely lucky, this powerful and honorable manuscript contains such phenomenal ninja wisdom as:
•How to create and name your very own lethal ninja clan
•The proper weapon to use when fighting a vampire pumpkin
•Why clowns and robots are so dangerous on the Internet
•Easy-to-follow charts showing when to slice and when to stab
•How to execute such ultradeadly kicks as the Driving Miss Daisy
•Why pretty much every ninja movie ever made sucks
•How to make a shoggoth explode using well-placed foliage
•What the heck a shoggoth is and why you’ll need to make it explode
•Death Aide certification
•And much more ninjafied enlightenment on every shuriken-sharp page!
Remember: People do not take the Path, the Path takes people.
Expand title description text
Reference Sports & Recreations Nonfiction Humor (Nonfiction)